Last week of Summer: Part 2

So today at the clinic Ryan came. He's the Physicians Assistant that comes to the clinic twice a week. It's always kind of crazy when he comes. Poor Nurse Mary got stressed out by some of it. Afterward, Kristen and I decided that we had to have coffee to help us. We spent a lovely morning reading these books while we sipped our coffee. The top two are mine. I just finished Jane Eyre and I must say that I really enjoyed it. I just started To Kill A Mocking Bird yesterday but am really enjoying it as well. The style of writing is so unique. I like it. :-)

I'm really sad that the summer is over. I had so many things I wanted to do, yet I feel like I didn't accomplish anything but read a few books. I started a summer reading list and To Kill A Mocking Bird was the first one added. It's kind of humerous that it's the last one I'll be reading this summer. I've read some great books these last few months, like Crazy Love and One Thousand Gifts but most of the books were ones I just wanted to read.
Are you ever doing something and you can feel God right there in the middle of it? It's so obvious that He's working in it that you don't think twice about why you're doing it so long as it's glorifying to God? I love those times. That's how I felt when I was reading those two books, but the others? Pheeh... I could of done without them.
I strive each day to complete each task as if it were asked of me by God Himself and every day I fail miserably. Sometimes I start something and I know that I could be doing something more eternally worthy. Yet, I like what I'm doing so I don't go do that more worthy thing. That's when I get mad at myself. Most of my bad moods are the result of having a war with myself. Do you ever just sit and fight about things in your head? Yep, that's me every day. It's kind of like the two angels on your shoulder, except I don't picture it that way.

This fighting within myself has been my main struggle this summer. Even while working with Kristen I've wondered what God's purpose is in it. But knowing that he has some great big plan to come of it just amazes me. I love working with Kristen. She's an amazing person and she's been such a blessing to me. She's so encouraging when others are discouraging. I know God put her in my life to prepare for something. I'm curious what it is.

I probably overthink the whole, "I wonder what God's is planning in this?" business. I don't know, people always ask why things happen and my reply is that God has a plan in it. It may not be mind blowing to you at this time, but just wait... Every day of our lives leads up to something. Every moment... do ever just think how big a difference saying hello to someone makes? For some reason I've been realizing this summer how different people react to a simple hello. It's actually really interesting. There's this girl who works at the cafeteria and I always try to be really nice to her because she always seems down in the dumps. So tonight I said hello to her and smiled and she didn't even say anything. I wonder why she does that. Did I hurt her once? I don't know. I've only talked with her a few times and I don't know if I offended her in some way, or maybe that's just the way she is. I'm going to try to be polite and kind to her whenever I see her but whenever she looks at me it's this blank stare and I wonder how it got to that point. I'm still going to say hi to her everytime she takes my ID card. It just makes me sad that it's like that.

All this to say, only 3 days left of work with Kristen and I wonder how we got to be such good friends. I love it. :-) Consider for a second what made you good friends with people. Was it something they did for you once? Was it something you did for them? Or did it just happen suddenly? I worked with a new guy the first six weeks and sadly I didn't get along with him that well. We were friendly to each other, and still are, but I definitely wouldn't spend more time than I had to around him. I don't like that I feel that way. He is still a child of God and even though our personalities clash it does not mean that I shouldn't show him the same Christian love I'm trying to show that girl who takes my ID card at the cafeteria. Do you have people like this in your life? It's hard, isn't it?
We can pray for each other friends. :-) Pray for me that I'll be kind and loving to this co-worker and show him that I am a follower of God. But most of all, pray that I'll strive to be Godly in all that I do. I've really been messing up lately. Or maybe I've just become more aware of how nasty I am. Either way, I can feel God working and though it hurts, I am happy for it.
I love you friends.