"I Could Play The Background"

"I could play the background.
I could play the background.
Cuz I know sometimes I get in the way.
So won't you take the lead, lead, lead.
So won't you take the lead, lead, lead.
And I can play the background, background.
And you can take the lead.

Verse 1 [Lecrae]
It's evident you run the show so let me back down.
You take the leading role, and I'll play the background.
I know I miss my cues, know I forget my lines
I'm sticking to your script, and I'm reading all your signs.
I don't need my name in lights.
I don't need a starring role.
And why gain the whole wide world, if I'm just gon' loose my soul.
And my ways ain't purified, I'll live according to your Word.
I can't endure this life without your wisdom being heard."

OK, I know this is a rap song, but it has some of the best lyrics I've ever heard. I have been struggling with wanting to the 'best'. The best in my anatomy class, the best in my chem class... I've always desired to be the best at whatever I do. I try to hide this fact quite frequently. As finals role around, and my grades are not what I would like them to be, I realize that I do not have to be "the best" at what I do. It's impossible... I will never be the best. When I have the 'best' mindset in play. I forget that I am not in control of my life. God is in control. I mess up(miss my cues) and go against God's will(forgetting my lines) so I want to "play the background" and not be "the starring role". Why would I want to gain the whole world, if I'm just going to loose my soul? I can't endure this life without His wisdom being heard. My entire purpose is to glorify the Lord. How can I play the lead if I want to shout His glory through my life? It is only possible if He is in the lead.

"So I don't want to take the lead
Cuz I'm prone to make mistakes.
All these folks that follow me gon' end up in the wrong place.
So, just let me shadow you. And just let me trace your lines.
Matter fact just take my pen.
Here, you create my rhymes.
Cuz if I do this by myself I'm scared that I'll succeed.
And no longer trust in You, cuz I only trust in me.
And see, that's how you end up headed to destruction.
Paving a road to nowhere. Pour your life out for nothing.
You pulled my card, I'm bluffing
You know what's in my hand.
Me I just roll to trust you to cause the dice to land.
I'm in control of nothing. Follow you at any cost.
Some call it sovereign will, all I know is you the boss.
And man I'm so at ease. I'm so content.
I play the background like it's an instrument."

This is the hard part; making myself let go of everything and step back. This has been especially difficult lately. My family has been going through some rough times and it's hard to not just be saying "OK God, you are not doing it right. Let me have control and I'll fix it." But, honestly, I would make everything so much more difficult. I am extremely thankful that I do not have control over my life. God knows my entire history and my entire future, he know what I need, and what I don't need. There has never been a time in my life when I am more at peace and more content than when I step back and say, "God, I trust you.". "I play the background like it's an instrument." God has my music before Him and He is playing it according to His Will.

"I know I'm safest when I'm in your will and trust your word.
And I know I'm dangerous when I trust myself; my vision blurred.
And I ain't got no time to play life's foolish games.
Got plenty aims but do they really glorify your name.
And its a shame the way I want to do these things for you, yeah.
Don't even cling to you. Take time to sit and glean from you.
And its seems that you are patient in my ignorance.
If ignorance is bliss, its cuz she never heard of this.


Chorus. [C-Lite]
I could play the background.
I could play the background.
Cuz I know sometimes I get in the way.
So won't you take the lead, lead, lead.
So won't you take the lead, lead, lead.
And I can play the background, background.
And you can take the lead."

Youtube this song. It's called "Background" by Lacrae. It is a rap song, but it has amazing lyrics. When I listen to it I am reminded that I am not in the lead, and I do not have to worry about things if I trust the Lord. He is in the lead, and I am playing the background.