One Week

Sometimes I get tired of just existing. By existing I mean doing the same thing over and over. Every morning my alarm clock goes off at 5:45am. I usually wake up at 5:37am and sigh with happiness at the fact that I get to sleep 8 more minutes. Then my alarm clock goes off and I lay there thinking about how much I don't want to get up for the next 6 minutes. Then I get up, go to the bathroom, get dressed, brush my teeth, put my make-up on, make my bed, check my email, check my back-pack, and head to breakfast at 6:25am. Then I leave breakfast at 6:45 and walk to work to unlock the doors for my co-workers at 6:50am. Every morning this is what happens. Well, almost every morning. This morning I ate oatmeal in my room so my routine was slightly disturbed.
I watched this movie just now called "One Week". It's about a guy, Ben, who finds out he has cancer and is terminal. He buys a motorcycle and heads to the Pacific, leaving his fiance and family behind. I loved the movie. I'm not sure why.
I read in my nursing book the other day that it's important for nurses to avoid things that put them in a negative mood. And it's not that I'm in negative mood, I'm just contemplative, which usually results in me going to bed sad.
I wonder, why do I do the same thing every day? Why do I always get up at 5:45? Why do I love routine, yet hate it so much? I can't answer these questions. I have no idea what I would if someone asked me these things.
One day God is going to kick me in the butt with something that was not in my planner and that does not fit into my schedule and I'm going to realize how ultimately God is in control of my life. I know He is, I just get caught up in routine and then just about this time every semester, I get sick of my routine and wish for something else. I'm tired of just existing. I want to live every day as if it were my last. I want to live every day thinking that if this were my last chance to glorify God here on earth, what would I do? How would I be significant in my 'oh so short' life?
Micro is calling my name... Bed will come after that. :-)

I love you, friends...

This song was in the movie. It's beautiful. :-)